What?! A free Saturday? Yeah, right.

Here’s a giant tease. My wife happily and sweetly and generously told me that this Saturday she and the kids are visiting a friend at the beach. They’re even taking the dog. This would mean that I would be left home all alone. No chauffering kids around, no chores, no having to make small talk with people I have no desire to know. Just me, the newspaper, and my beloved TV. Sounds too good to be true, right? That’s why I know it will never happen. I’m not a cynic. Honest. I’m a glass half full kind of guy. But I’ve been in this situation before. It always falls through. My wife’s friend will cancel last second, whereupon I’ll blame my family and maybe even hate them for just a second. Or one of my kids will get sick just to ruin my day. Of course I love my kids. I just want them gone this Saturday. No matter what. There’s so much that could go wrong that I can’t even enjoy the thought of a free Saturday happening. And even if it does happen (it won’t), I’ll just sit there waiting for the call from my wife telling me they’re coming home early. Maybe I do have an attitude problem. Either way, my Saturday is ruined. I’ll tell you about how it went to crap after this loooooonnng three-day weekend, which I am not looking forward to at all. Hey, but you have a good one, okay? Someone should.

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5 Responses to What?! A free Saturday? Yeah, right.

  1. Rider says:

    Oh man, good luck, Pal. If you get the Saturday, please let me know how you did it. I haven’t had one of those since Carter was president.

  2. Peaches says:

    Hey, don’t blame the wives! We don’t get a second on the weekends either. Though I am rooting for you.

  3. I.M. Tired says:

    I say salvage your weekend by surprising your kids with a neighborhood pool party.
    Yeah, 30 kids screaming, splashing and sucking down every last thing in your fridge.
    Isn’t that what your parents would have done for you?

    I’m thinking after the surprise party, have 15 of your kids “best” friends spend the night with a sleepover. After you wake up in the morning to feed the clan and clean up yesterday’s mess, you can officially kick back and

    Ahhhhhhhh peace.
    Thank God It’s Monday (or unfortunately this week Tuesday)

  4. Dr Monday says:

    Stay in school!
    Might need a back up plan, at some point…..get additional training. No limits!
    Think of it as a noble cause! Not neglecting your family, you are HELPING PEOPLE!

  5. Dr Monday says:

    Be an uncle, love them like they are your kids & let the mom & dad enjoy parenthood!

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